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You've Got Kayl

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    Only two weeks into the "real" world of working and I already feel stuck in a routine of sorts: Work, eat, Netflix, sleep, repeat. This must be what adulting is like. Not sure if I dislike it necessarily but it is very difficult for me to stay mindful of what's going on both around me and within me; I feel so tasked-driven rather than feeling or thought-driven. It's alarming. Everything feels so forced, so ordinary. And I don't know how to get out of this rut! As much as I know I am not spontaneous, I prefer structure to routine. I like to know what I have scheduled--no unexpected surprises--though I don't want to do the same thing every. single. day, which is what this feels like.


    On that note, my list of accomplishments for this week's Week in Review is basically filled with the usual weekly errands and such so I apologize in advance for a) the same old stuff and b) the lack of pictures!

    - Set out clothes for the upcoming week! Hopefully this unpredictable Texas weather calms the freak down.
    - Filled up my car with gas ⛽️
    - Got some bank issues sorted out and finally deposited my first internship paycheck!
    - Listened to a buttload of podcasts including 10% Happier, The Healthy Maven, Ladies Who Lunch and Let It Out with Katie Dalebout.
    - Volunteered at the animal shelter again with them doggies and kitties
    - Managed to devour most of this Korean feast with my fambam on Saturday night 🍴 🍴 🍴


    - Restocked the fridge with goodies from Central Market and H-Mart (local Asian grocery store)
    - Used said goodies to meal prep a lil' bit for the week: roasted butternut squash and zucchini and
    - Zoomed through reading Rupi Kaur's beautiful poetry book, Milk & Honey


    - Finished up the sixth season of Gilmore Girls. I reaaaally wanted to like Logan and I thought he would grow on me. But nope. Someone please tell me there's still hope for Rory & Jess!!! Plus, I'm so frustrated about Luke and Lorelai's relationship. 😫  Ugh.
    - Removed my nail polish with ONE remaining cotton ball (with help from toilet paper and Q-tips), which sounds a lot harder than you think especially as was glitter-filled. Seriously, every time I wear glitter nail polish I swear never again then can't seem to learn my lesson.
    - Went on a Corner Bakery brunch date with my dear friend, Heather ☺️
    - A load of laundry washed, dried & all put away!
    - Concocted a sorta fusion shakshuka/fasolakia dish paired with a chunk of leftover homemade bread & feta cheese



    Questions:
    Do you prefer routine, structure, neither? 
    When a show's plot doesn't go your way to you stick with it til the end or give it up?
    Anyone else have issues with glittery nail polish? 


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    Thanks for joining me as I link up with Amanda and try to think out loud. I haven't done one of these in a quite some time (*cough* 4 months *cough*) but was suddenly inspired earlier this week.




    With this 9-to-5 type job where I am essentially sitting at a desk and staring at a computer screen all day long, it is hard for me to really be mindful. Then when I get home the last thing I want to do is sit in my feelings and think. It is too exhausting. Even right at this moment, I am struggling to write. There have been so many swirling, fleeting thoughts in my mind but I haven't been able to capture them fast enough in word form. In any case, I am attempting to push through the writer's block, hence this post.

    "The reason time moves so slowly when we're young is because everything's new, and we're taking it in for the first time. And when we get older we're actually not observing the world in a vital way anymore. And then things just speed up because we're not taking it in."


    On the train ride home from work on Monday (yes, I sadly did not have a long weekend 😥), I listened to the 10% Happier Podcast Episode featuring Josh Radnor (that's where that ^^^ quote is from). Knowing what I know of his character on How I Met Your Mother, it was odd to hear "Ted Mosby" talk about his meditation practice, finding sustainable peace within and success not based on fame.

    Listening to the podcast struck something in me because I have been feeling out of touch lately; everything seems to be passing me by, I am observing and absorbing life like I would like to. But on the train I was able to just sit there and stay mindful, present, grateful, curious. Despite there being people around me, for the first time in weeks, I felt at peace.

    Love love love Recovery Warriors


    As I was doing my intern training, I came across another aspect of mindfulness that I feel will come in handy to stay present particularly as I continue to work. Part of the company's culture, which is seriously refreshing for an accounting firm, is this concept of a mood elevator, a tool to aid in checking in with yourself and gauge where you are in the moment.

    Throughout the day, the point you're at on the elevator will vary, up and down we go; it's near impossible to be on the same floor constantly. At our most ground level, we are curious. The goal is not to stay out of the red zone but more to know when you are in the red zone and respond accordingly, inching up towards at least curiosity. It's at these higher "floors" where you are most productive and function at your best.

    Source
    What I love about this is that at the top is not happiness, is not joy, as you might expect. But rather, it's the feeling of gratitude. And this gratitude for me, I think, closely relates to the feeling of peace. If we can find appreciation and be thankful for the present moment, we can find peace. We can slow down even on a moving train.

    P.S. I know this is all over the place today and nothing relates but that's essentially a sneak peak inside my brain! Til' next time y'all ✌️

    Questions:
    - Do you ever forget that celebrities aren't their characters? 😂
    - What are ways you check-in with how you are feeling during the day especially at work/in class?
    - How do you deal with writer's block or rather a surplus of thoughts and scarcity of words?  
    - Where are you right now on the elevator? 


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    Hihi,

    Hope you all are having a lovely week! I have finished Week 1 of my internship and I am pooped. My body and mind are not used to being out and about for 9 hours a day. How did I survive high school?!! Seriously though, TGIF!!!!! 🎉 🍻

    There is a special aura of being downtown that just energizes me. Looking forward to exploring the city more and more over the next few months!


    Up ahead for my weekend include The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime play, the second half of season 4 of Gilmore Girls, hopefully getting my yoga & meditation on, volunteering at the animal shelter and possibly some baking. Sadly, I do not get Monday off but on the bright side, traffic shouldn't be an issue!

    If you are looking for some reading for your long weekend, here are some of the links that caught my attention this week:

    1. For My Fellow Overthinkers - If you're feeling filled with worry or are forgetting to give yourself a break, another note to self from the wonderful Cupcakes and Cashmere. Remember to check yourself. Ask why it matters: How important is it in the grand scheme of things? Will it matter a year from now?

    2. The Reality of Anxiety - Being anxious or at least admitting it is something relatively new to me. Mostly because I think the "image" of what anxiety looks like is so skewed, so lacking; I didn't really know what it meant. This quick TC read does a great job of illustrating what anxiety actually is. It spoke to my soul to say the least.

    3. Some Bachelor Contestants Secrets - Anyone watching The Bachelor this season??? 🙋 The show is my (not-so) guilty pleasure along with America's Next Top Model. There are some interesting personalities on this season... Check out this insider info on the BTS! Definitely a lighter read amidst these links.

    4. How Perfectionism Holds Us Back - Growing up, I really did not at all consider myself a perfectionist. I guess I thought it meant cutting paper in a straight line or hanging a picture frame up perfectly. (Which in case you didn't no is totally not it.) After reading this article, it pretty much solidified that I completely am. Literally all of these 9 ways are me.... Maybe not something to be proud of...

    5. Asian Americans Views on their Multiracial Experiences - Coming from a mixed family (Filipina + White in case you didn't know) myself, this video gave me good thoughts to ponder on my cultural identity. Since moving to the U.S., the battle between both sides of me has been somewhat isolating--feeling like no one relates to my unusual upbringing-- and hearing these others' words made me feel a little less alone.

    6. Don't Be Ashamed of Your Depression - Sarah shared some wise words on the stigma around mental illnesses whether it be anxiety, depression or something else entirely. As mentioned (see 2), accepting my slight depression (and anxiety) has been difficult for me particularly in the past because I thought that I needed a reason to be, that my feelings weren't valid, that things could be worse. So the vulnerability shared in her own struggles is truly inspiring. Plus the recipe for delicious looking cauliflower tacos is an awesome bonus!!!

    I can be a positive person AND have depression--they are not mutually exclusive. 


     Questions:
    Have any tips for dealing with overthinking? 
    What are your weekend plans?
    Do you have any TV guilty pleasures?


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    As I type this up on Sunday evening, I am watching the Golden Globes and attempting to eat soup with a teaspoon (the dishwasher with all our legit spoons is running). If this not the definition of an accomplishment, then I don't know what is.


    For once, I actually felt productive this week before going through Meghan's Week in Reviews. It's weird. After having done several of these, it starts to get easier and easier to appreciate the little feats of accomplishments that occur throughout my week in the moment rather than in retrospect.

    This upcoming week is an exciting one for me. I am starting a full-time internship at an international accounting firm. So while many other college students begin classes, I will be homework, test and readings-less for about 8 weeks! I don't 100% know what my work schedule will be like. It's definitely challenging and slightly anxiety-provoking to not be able to plan, to not be in control. With this being said, no matter what the case, I plan to make more time for You've Got Kayl.




    - Treated myself to a brunch at a restaurant downtown after making a practice run to the office. Loved the vibe at the restaurant ^^^
    - Got my Costco membership card!!!! 🙌  🙌  🙌
    - Finished my last week of intensive outpatient treatment


    - Made it through 3 meetings with my dieticians, 2 meetings with my therapists and 1 meeting with the discharge facilitator
    - Spent the entire Saturday afternoon meal preppin': making this curry sweet potato and lentil (sub split pea) soup, baking some egg muffins, roasting broccoli, chopping up some kale & romaine, cooking a large batch of quinoa
    - Put those shelves up that I talked about last week  with my dad's help of course. This included using a power drill for the first time whaaaaat??!
    - After an ungodly and majorly disgusting length of time that would be embarrassing to disclose, I cleaned my makeup brushes!


    - Load of laundry, check! ✔️
    - Won a game of Clue against my sister and mother. One last hurray of board gaming before we all get busy with work and school.
    - Slowly learning how to binge watching with the help of Gilmore Girls. I'm on Season 4 and I'm desperately missing Jess! Oh, young Milo Ventimigilia 😍  I swoon!

    Source

    -
     Went on a froyo date with someone I met on Tinder (no shame!). Went just alright but that's life isn't it? Got to remember to keep putting myself out there.
    - Got some grocery shopping done. Can't say no to 3 for $5 containers of berries!
    - Planned out most of my outfits for the rest of the week as I begin working on Monday (aka today)...since with that comes waking up at 6:15...every day....fun. 😴
    - Had another sister lunch with my favorite sibling. Hot ramen soup + singing along to Disney and Broadway songs in the car + wandering around a used bookstore



    - Finally caught up and commented on all those blog posts that I let stack up. Time to fill up more tabs!


    Questions:
    Do you lay out your clothes in advance to save time in the morning?
    What's your favorite on-the-go meals? I'm new to this whole meal prep thing and need your help/advice/suggestions! 
    With the first of fifty two weeks down, what is something you're looking forward to in 2017? 


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    Hello from the other side of the new year! Hope your celebration was lovely however which way you spent it. Mine was reeeeeaaally low-key spent at my aunt's snacking on some food, wearing PJs & Ugg-like boots and snuggling with the cutest doggy. To continue this celebration/reflection of the new year, I'm linking up with Meghan for another Week in Review. Here are the things I got done in the last week of 2016:





    - Wrote out thank you notes for my Christmas gifts I got; since as long as I can remember, my mom has had my sister and I write down who gave what in these little booklets as we open our gifts to potentially thank the gifters afterwards. I honestly never done it growing up but to better adult, I wanted to actually do them this year. So there's checking that off!
    - Finished my 52nd book of the year on the 31st just in the nick of time to complete my annual goal. WOO! 🙌


    - Literally cranked out some homemade noodles. Ate mine with pesto and italian sausage topped with cheese. Yumyumyum
    - Finished the 1st season of crazy ex girlfriend with my mama. Super, super cringe inducing show; if you can't handle awkward situations like my sister (s/o if you're reading sissy ❤️) seriously don't watch it
    - Made these delicious date & walnut bites. basically just threw dates, walnuts, ginger, vanilla and turmeric into my new food processor (!!!) and pulsed away.
    - Successfully devoured an entire seemingly child-sized carrot cake pancake by myself



    - Updated my new planner with birthdays & anniversaries
    - Unloaded the dishwasher a few times which seems to magically fill up the exact second after
    - Went out to watch La La Land the day the morning after Christmas. Good movie but much sadder than expected. 😞  On another note, they have the soundtrack on Spotify and it's totally fun to jam out to.


    - Also made mini chocolate chip & pumpkin bundts loosely based off of Izy's recipe. Subbed with coconut oil and dark chocolate
    - Picked up the crochet needle again and am in the process of making a hat. Hopefully this will continue over the 363 days
    - Beat my sister and cousin in an intense battle of Marvel Munchkin
    - After months of letting them sit there, I channeled my inner Joanna Gaines and stained slabs of wood. Time to make them look like these shelves!

    Questions
    What good movies have you seen at the theater recently? 
    Do you keep a planner? 
    Have you ever made your own pasta from scratch?
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    Kaylee G.

    Twenty-something year old Filipino American on her way to redefining her relationship with health and finding herself.

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